Farewell my lunch...

and more importantly, farewell my caffine IV.

Tomorrow starts the Baha'i Fasting Month. 19 days where i will try to focus on something other than my incessant need for sugar and coffee. 19 days, where i will try to rise above. The rules are simple: focus on something other than physical needs, don't eat or drink anything from sunrise to sunset, try to maintain a prayerful state. I've found most religions have a form of fasting. Ours looks most like Ramadan in its practice. It's a month i love--it always brings clarity, focus, and determination. I get to pour my stubborn will into something worthwhile. I think of it like exercise--feel the burn, know you are doing the work. Refocus, meditate, find time for my soul.

The truth is i've struggled pretty hard with this over the years. I have always wanted to make it through the whole month fasting--i've only managed it twice. There are a list of exceptions to fasting--including doctor's orders--which is where i get in trouble. According to my doctors, i'm banned from fasting. I have a hard time sustaining my body weight (as my eating of immense amounts of junk doesn't actually help me add weight it just holds me steady at a whopping 102). Usually after a week to 10 days i lose those 2 safety pounds, plumt into double digits and have to go back to eating something for lunch so that my pants don't fall off me.

My professors (one of whom will have to deal with my brainless and two of whom will have to deal with me coming in and out of class to pray) have been duly notified--and are sympathetic--one is in Lent right now, one lived in Egypt, and the other is my Law and Religion professor--who seems to be hoping to hold it together for the most part in there, as i am the voice of many things unmainstream :)

And so it begins.

the inevitable post finals " i AM a slug" day

I feel like i'm dragging my feet around...like a slug. I'm sure if someone dumped a bunch of salt on me i would melt down totally.

slug

I dropped Adam off at the airport last night with his friend Jerome and J's folks. They are off to lie on the beach in Cancun for 5 days and enjoy ruins. I'm green with envy (see yet another thing i have in common with slugs). He will be back ENSHALLAH (God Willing) a whomping 30 hrs before we are to leave for Israel. My control freak nature was doing ok with this until he told me they were flying through O'Hare on the 23rd---at which point it was like said slug salting started and i almost melted down. I threatened him with death a few times and then drove away from the curb.

In the 30 hrs when he's back, we are doing Christmas eve with his family. I haven't done Christmas in a really long time. I don't remember anything about the couple times i think we went to church with friends as kids. All i remember is the Winegarden's Christmas lights. His family isn't particularly religious, which is good for me considering i AM. Although being Baha'i is frequently much more like a lifestyle and foundation for spirituality than a religion in my head.  Anyways, back to Christmas eve. Haven't ever done it as a grown-up, but I do appreciate that this is when humanity celebrates the birth of Christ. So, for the gift exchange i got these handmade wine glasses. I don't drink---but i wanted to get something pretty, perhaps useful (sparking cider is good in them too!) and support a local artist. I got the glasses from my friend Brooke's man: Justin Bagley. They are hand blown---black stems with irridescent gold cup parts. Really lovely.

In the meantime, I get to do all the things I have wanted to do for quite a while---like make it to a devotional called Unity Night at the Simmons home, take a whole bunch of stuff to Goodwill, buy Mona a bridal shower present, get the brakes checked, wash and clean out the truck and deep clean the apartment before the trip!!  If anyone's got free time, I would love to do coffee/dinner/Skype/see Avatar with you :)