the census people called again.

you know, i really honestly, truly, with my whole little black heart thought that after i yelled so profusely last time the census would never call again. i was certain that they wouldn't want to inflict that disaster on yet another hapless government worker. really, i was just convinced my tax money should not be spent to annoy the shit out of me.

wrong on all counts.

after the fourth time they called this morning, i decided i needed a new strategy. One of my partners in crime came up with a 'genius' solution (as he safely can from China where no one annoyingly calls you to ask about how many runaway babies live in your apartment)

Partner in Crime: u should tell them 2 polish people, 10 illegal hispanic migrants, and a (i was about to name a terrorist group, but for the love of god don't wanna end up on a no fly list) all live in ur apartment and hold u hostage, forcing u to take in the strange runaway babies and the people from the homeless shelter 2 blocks one way or the halfway house next door.

hmmm. nice idea dude, bad plan....can only lead to more questions and asking of why i lied on the census, because these people OBVIOUSLY cannot use their brains and figure out the facetiousness of it all.

i've decided the proper solution is everyone's favorite "you've got the wrong number". 

Alternative ideas, dear readers, stalkers, or obliged members of the familia?